If we had to sum up this week in two words, they would probably be…
Sexual harassers are getting fired. Asshole politicians are being investigated. The matriarchy is NIGH and we are celebrating with the freshest tweets from the dopest women. YAAASSSSS.
2017 doesn’t need an extra hour!
— Amy Rhodes (@iamamyrhodes) November 5, 2017
Look at these suckers on their first day of improv 101 pic.twitter.com/9ozzOHK6OC
— Beth Alexandroff (@bethalexandroff) November 13, 2017
“yr not like other girls” my guy i am the amalgamation of every single girl i’ve ever thought was cool
— lil (@chickpeapatty) November 7, 2017
Most guys can’t find the comparative literature classes pic.twitter.com/JB87BbHFKf
— Vron (@veronicaj119) November 7, 2017
*adult man has a job and basic decency*
women: wow he truly is the total package
— Lane Moore (@hellolanemoore) November 7, 2017
Me, when there’s more than two cars in the drive-thru pic.twitter.com/b4zyvU2wvE
— Jemele Hill (@jemelehill) November 6, 2017
hey baby guess what if i liked your tweet with a typo and you deleted it and retweeted it ima go back and like that new tweet without the typo cuz i’m a true down ass bitch
— Kerry O’Neill (@iamkerryoneill) November 9, 2017
Off-screen, a toilet flush. God returns to his desk. He checks the video monitors marked “Earth.” A rolled-up Newsweek drops to the floor.
— Elizabeth Hackett (@LizHackett) November 6, 2017
Us: Gun control?
Us: Treatment for mentally ill?
Us: Health care for bullet holes?
GOP: More guns
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) November 6, 2017
Me on election day in 2016 v. Me on election day in 2017 pic.twitter.com/VhEJD7468n
— lyz lenz (@lyzl) November 7, 2017
I love how men can sort of rape and molest and slur their way through Hollywood with their reputation intact but women get bounced for eating bread
— Anna Drezen (@annadrezen) November 9, 2017
I’ll give you my email for the raffle but, and I mean this, you have to promise me you’ll also use it for your mailing list.
— Renee Colvert (@ReneeColvert) November 3, 2017
*uses last breath to grunt in Extremely Manly Voice* living is for GIRLS pic.twitter.com/uN561EyZT5
— aimee (@aimeeclarke) November 6, 2017
Imagine being so rich that u hold an iPhone by the very corner pic.twitter.com/AGK4V76Gqe
— Marcella Arguello (@marcellacomedy) November 4, 2017
maybe after the glock, hit up some other wal-mart aisles for shoes and helmets pic.twitter.com/cC9FtAy8WM
— christine teigen (@chrissyteigen) November 9, 2017
listen…valentines day is a scam invented by scorpios so people would have sex and make more scorpios
— kombitcha (@billnihilism) November 3, 2017
I assume everyone who’s called me a liar and a cunt for the past three years will be sending me an Edible Arrangement the second the Louis C.K. NYT story breaks.
— Megan Beth Koester (@bornferal) November 9, 2017
thor and loki over the years pic.twitter.com/uc6hsgH5jM
— ? (@bilrac) November 5, 2017