Teens are saving the world. America is getting smoked by Canada in the Olympics. It’s actually cold in LA. Everything is topsy turvy this week and we are OVERWHELMED.
Time to simmer down and chill out with our favorite Friday treat – the weekly tweet round-up!
I said “no” to something for the first time & now I’m high out of my mind
— Aparna Nancherla (@aparnapkin) February 20, 2018
The future is female and it doesn’t have time for styling products. pic.twitter.com/F3Ae1bnoWq
— Joanna Robinson (@jowrotethis) February 23, 2018
The biggest mistake you can make is to start your day as soon as you wake up. Take it slow! Meditate, drink some coffee, read the news, make some breakfast, watch a little TV, start a puzzle, clean the bathroom, watch more TV, call in sick, quit your job, keep watching TV.
— Alison Stevenson (@JustAboutGlad) February 19, 2018
IDEA: Maybe if we renamed guns “bullet abortions” conservatives would try to ban them.
— Alison Stevenson (@JustAboutGlad) February 20, 2018
“I would have seen Black Panther 3 times opening weekend if I could have” pic.twitter.com/6rLj2SdnIh
— Dana Schwartz (@DanaSchwartzzz) February 19, 2018
My Lyft driver asked if I was going to work, and I said, “No, I’m going to therapy,” but I sang the word therapy so now he thinks I’m dangerous.
— Kristen Bartlett (@kristencheeks) February 22, 2018
I used a maternity leave to grow out my bangs.
And that is why she will always be my favourite child.
— Just J (@junejuly12) February 21, 2018
Many whites have complained about not seeing themselves represented in Black Panther but I for one felt very accurately depicted by the character of annoying lady too oblivious to notice her coffee tastes weird
— Natalie Walker (friend of Paddington) (@nwalks) February 20, 2018
me when I get my period: why am I eating & crying so much? is my depression worsening? What if im dying??? Omg im dying this is how I die. I die soon.
me later that night: dude ur not dying this is literally what ur period is. every single time.
why am I eating & cr
— Lane Moore (@hellolanemoore) February 16, 2018
a child just bit me on the subway and his mom told him to actualize an apology and led him thru some deep breathing and oms and then thanked me for the wisdom of eastern religions brought to the world so….
i still hate park slope is the moral of this story
— krutika (remix) [feat. cardi b] (@krutika) February 19, 2018
As a woman, I just want the same rights as a rattlesnake. pic.twitter.com/JQIFDoDTUL
— Jackie Carbajal (@jackiecarbajal) February 22, 2018
My anxiety and my depression changing shifts like: pic.twitter.com/ebwLfbz1tk
— Kendra Alvey (@Kendragarden) February 21, 2018
i bet the Wakandan standup scene has so many women in it
— Cameron Esposito (@cameronesposito) February 18, 2018
Look, I’m just going to say it: It’s weird that there’s no female cereal mascot.
— Jennifer Wright (@JenAshleyWright) February 19, 2018
I’m a museum https://t.co/91EYjIuQFk
— ? (@iamoni_) February 17, 2018
Me in the mirror after I finish a whole bottle of wine by myself pic.twitter.com/aozl3fSE4E
— This Woman (@KingThandie) February 19, 2018
— Hannah Giorgis (@ethiopienne) February 19, 2018
true life: i thought i was a “quirky girl” but it turns out i’m just deeply traumatized and unable to function in a society built around one’s capacity to perform labor under capitalism
— J. Jennifer Espinoza (@sadqueer4life) February 21, 2018