It’s the weekend. Next week is a short week. And also, wine still exists.
All in all, there’s a lot to be grateful for. And the hilarious women who wrote these tweets are very high on that list. Truly blessed.
Overheard in dressing room
Girl 1: that dress is CUTE on you
Girl 2: well, yes. but is it cute enough to destroy his whole life?— emery lord (@emerylord) November 12, 2017
[thanksgiving dinner 2017]
them: everyone go around the table and say what they’re thankful for
me: are you fucking kidding me right now— beth angryoctopus ? (@bourgeoisalien) November 14, 2017
Call me old-fashioned, but I want a man who will protect me like I’m the reputation of a guy he’s never met
— Kate Willett (@katewillett) November 11, 2017
All my niece had to do was write a sentence. She had one job ??♀️? pic.twitter.com/h9AfxteDyd
— Kenya B (@kenyabri) November 15, 2017
This cat looks like it’s being interviewed by the NYT about Trump’s broken promise to bring bodega cat jobs to its town. pic.twitter.com/oXKqIe4C7K
— Brandi Knows That’s Tombili, A Famous Turkish Cat (@ItsTheBrandi) November 13, 2017
*explaining sex*
well sweetie sometimes when two people are vaguely attracted to each other and want to feel bad about themselves —— Dani Fernandez (@msdanifernandez) November 15, 2017
hot dating tip: don’t.
— Mary Ellen Murray (@maryellenmurr) November 12, 2017
Me. pic.twitter.com/G51incNU07
— Emily V Gordon (@emilyvgordon) November 14, 2017
Thank God we don’t have a female president. She’d be so emotionally volatile and obsessed with her appearance!
— Jess Dweck (@TheDweck) November 12, 2017
no they literally don’t pic.twitter.com/B3EzU1xK71
— infinity crush ? (@yrinfinitycrush) November 11, 2017
when you @ me pic.twitter.com/z43OudlBlI
— Anne T. Donahue (@annetdonahue) November 12, 2017
imagine a rom com so perfect they never end up together and just stay enemies with sexual tension until they both die
— Carina Hsieh (@carinahsieh) November 14, 2017
LA’s hottest new spot should be a women-only cocktail bar with cork walls where we can group scream about how garbage everything is.
— Jessica Ellis (@baddestmamajama) November 11, 2017
Me. pic.twitter.com/G51incNU07
— Emily V Gordon (@emilyvgordon) November 14, 2017
Whenever you’re feeling unloved, think back to that time at the petting zoo when one of the goats made prolonged, meaningful eye contact with you.
— War on Xmas Mancino-Williams (@Manda_like_wine) November 14, 2017
Women are just coming forward for all the free death threats.
— Pumpkin Rice! (@genevieverice) November 10, 2017
