Weekly Roundup Of The World’s Funniest Tweets

IT’S LABOR DAY WEEKEND BABYYYY!!

 

Our hearts are with people working on Monday. Let these funny tweets ease the pain of a regular weekend, and/or bring joy to your vacay.

 

Thank you so so much for writing our new Tinder bio.

 

What did they even talk about, sports? Snorkeling???

 

People with two moms turn out better, and that’s a fact.

 

Look it was a good concept, but sometimes you need to give up on a dream.

 

Brian’s Mom seems cool.

 

Hahahhahah oh wait this one is just true.

 

Important point!

 

You dinguses invented the ‘friend zone’, about time you learn to actually be a friend.

 

Better than friggin Thor 4 or whatever.

 

Srsly did we all just find the internet’s only good old white man?

 

Him: ‘And now for this 15 point slide illustrated by a stock photo of a dog’

Us: *chugging poison*

 

THAT LEMON IS A BETTER PERSON THAN EVERY RAPIST.

 

Denial. Anger. Bargaining. Shelby.

 

That’s just a smart use of time tho.

 

Please please someone in Hollywood make this movie, we are begging over here.

 

At least after you die no one will pressure you to go to grad school.

 

This bird is our intern now.

 

That’s that pre-regret face right there.

 

See, this is the kind of humor we can get behind.

 

There are entire religions based on worse advice. Good job Suzan.